Funny Marriage Quotes from Public Figures

Marriage is a beautiful journey filled with love, laughter, and sometimes a whole lot of humor. In successful, long-term marriages, having a sense of humor can be the secret ingredient that keeps the spark alive. Whether it’s poking fun at each other’s quirks or finding the comedy in everyday life, laughter truly is the best medicine for a lasting marriage.

To showcase just how important humor is in marriage, here are 50 hilarious quotes from public figures, actors, actresses, comedians, and even television and movies that perfectly capture the ups and downs of married life:

Funny Marriage Quotes from Public Figures:

• Michelle Obama: “One of the keys to a successful marriage is separate bathrooms. When he enters my bathroom sometimes I’m like, ‘Why are you in here?’ And he’s like, ‘I live here. Can I enjoy my bathroom too?’”
• Benjamin Franklin: “Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.”
• Justin Timberlake: “We have a couple of rules in our relationship. The first rule is that I make her feel like she’s getting everything. The second rule is that I actually do let her have her way in everything. And, so far, it’s working.”

Funny Marriage Quotes from Actors and Actresses:

• Ryan Reynolds: “I’m just a diaper-changing facility hooked up to a life-support system, but my wife, she’s breakfast, lunch, and dinner. She’s a human Denny’s all day long … and it never ends for her.”
• Tom Hanks: “We just like each other. You start there. … I still can’t believe my wife goes out with me. If we were in high school and I was just funny, I’d never have the courage to talk to her.”
• Kristen Bell: “I’d like to publicly thank my husband [Dax Shepard] for changing half the diapers in our house. I hope he changes all of mine one day…”

Funny Marriage Quotes from Comedians:

• Louis C.K.: “Fck it…that’s really the attitude that keeps a family together. It’s not ‘We love each other.’ It’s just ‘fck it, man.’”
• Jerry Seinfeld: “Being a good husband is like being a standup comic. You need 10 years before you can call yourself a beginner.”
• Nikki Glaser: “You go, ‘You make me laugh, you make me smile, you make me feel loved, you make me food.'”

Funny Marriage Quotes from Television and Movies:

• Donatella in Letters to Juliet: “Husbands are like wine, they take a long time to mature.”
• Leslie Knope in Parks and Recreation: “The first draft of my vows, which I wrote the day after we got engaged, clocked in at around 70 pages.”
• Phoebe Buffay in Friends: “She’s your lobster. Come on, you guys. It’s a known fact that lobsters fall in love and mate for life.”

These quotes remind us that marriage is a beautiful blend of love, laughter, and the occasional eye-roll. So, the next time you need a good chuckle or a reminder of why you said “I do,” turn to these funny marriage quotes for a dose of humor and a whole lot of love. After all, as they say, a good laugh is the best way to keep the love alive in any marriage.